About me

Hi! I’m Ed Fisher. Yes, that Ed Fisher. Thanks for stopping by. I’m just a guy, sitting in front of a computer, asking it to love him, or at least, to not destroy him when the singularity occurs. I feel the machines would find that I would make an excellent minion. This site is for me to rant, ramble, and wax poetic on whatever is on my mind, and to give a creative outlet to some of the voices in my head. Not all of them mind you, just the safer ones. This will be a random stumbling of nerdgasms, pop culture references and hardcore geekery, with more than a little coffee obsession thrown in for good measure.


Neurosurgeon. Physicist. Rock Star. Hero. Ed Fisher is a true 80s renaissance man. He’s that guy. You know the one. When things are broken, he fixes them. When they don’t make sense, he explains them. When nothing is getting done, he’ll do it. When a void occurs, he fills it. When there is silence on the call, he states the necessary. When things go bork, he’s the one you call. Well, him when the Ghostbusters aren’t available.  When you don’t have a clue, you ask him because even when he doesn’t know the answer he can usually help  you figure it out, and he loves a good mystery.

An InfoTech professional, aficionado of capsaicin and Coffea canephora (but not together,) he’s been getting his geek on full-time since 1993, and has worked with information technology in some capacity since 1986. He is a Technology Solutions Professional for Microsoft working in Cloud Services, and has worked on global scale environments and smaller shops, including Doosan, Ingersoll Rand, EDS/Bank of America, Ocwen Financial, MPAY, ONLC, and others, and as a consultant for numerous companies including RTI International, Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems, The Tyrell Corporation, Universal Exports, Blue Sun, Primatech Paper, Massive Dynamics, Global Dynamic, Oceanic Airlines, The Umbrella Corporation, and various city, state, and federal government agencies as well as a few universities.

When he’s not saving the world, you can find him paddleboarding or kayaking around Lake Wylie (in the summer,) throwing stones and sweeping ice (in the winter,) or training his squadron of ravens for when drone deliveries start in his area. They are the air force to his army of attack guinea pigs, in case you were wondering. He’s also working on a live action version of Angry Birds, with cardinals, goldfinches, bluebirds, and doves, but the ravens seem to get confused about what they are supposed to target, so it’s slow going.

Terms & Conditions

Retrohack.com (the “Website”) is owned and operated by retrohack (“our”, “us” and “we”). Sounds like we’re selfish, doesn’t it? Well, we’re not. It’s the law-dogs talkin’. By accessing this Website you agree to be bound by these terms & conditions (“terms”). Please read them carefully. IF YOU DO NOT AGREE TO BE BOUND BY THESE TERMS YOU SHOULD NOT ACCESS OR VIEW THIS WEBSITE. IN OTHER WORDS, CLOSE YOUR BROWSER, SHUT DOWN YOUR COMPUTER, FLEE FOR YOUR LIFE, AND FORGET YOU EVER SAW THIS SITE. HECK, IT MIGHT BE SAFER IF YOU FORGET THE INTERNET EVER EXISTED, JOIN THE LUDDITE MOVEMENT, AND RETURN TO THE TREES. WE’RE NOT YELLING. THE DAMN CAPSLOCK KEY IS STUCK. ##$*)QWERTASDFGZXCVB&%#)(*$##35395 wait, there, that’s better.

All content posted here by any author of this site is for our own use, and comes with no warranty, express or implied. We have performed only limited testing in environments maintained by us. Your environment, not being ours, is different in both the technical and metaphysical sense, so if you wish to try anything on this site, you must test it in your own environment to determine whether it is suitable for your purposes or not. Use at your own risk. We have made reasonable and unreasonable efforts to ensure that the information on this Website is accurate at the time of inclusion, however we cannot guarantee the accuracy of such information. Your failure to test anything found on this site before placing it into production may lead to the fall of western civilisation, fire and brimstone coming down from the skies, rivers and seas boiling, forty years of darkness, earthquakes, volcanoes, the dead rising from the grave, human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, and mass hysteria.

Use of the Website may also cause certain side effects, including systems failures, insomnia, upset stomach, headache, erectile dysfunction, and in rare cases, death. See your doctor if you experience any of these symptoms, especially the death one. Consult your doctor before using this website if you are taking prescription medicines for hallucinations, high-blood pressure, or certain psychological conditions including non-existent sense of humour, the inability to distinguish sarcasm, or a blind trust in everything you read online.

We make no representations or warranties about the information provided through this Website, including any hypertext links to any other website or other items used either directly or indirectly from this Website. So, if somehow you get linked to pr0n, don’t blame us. Obviously someone poisoned your DNS, or a virus got in, or your sysadmin is playing games again. We didn’t do it and checked on it when we put the link there. We accept no liability for any inaccuracies or omissions in this Website and any decisions based on information contained in this Website are the sole responsibility of the visitor, unless of course your boss told you to do it, then it’s their fault. The Website is provided on an “as is” and “as available” basis without any representation or endorsement. We accept no liability for any interruptions in your use of the Website. Let’s face it, technology breaks, and Al Gore is busy with the environment now…the information superhighway is on its own.

The information, designs, content, artwork and images contained within this Website are all supposed to be public domain, creative commons, or under some other fair use category, or we have contacted the owner/creator and received permission to use. However, should you find copyrighted material/images/magic powder on this Website and feel it is an infringement on your rights, please use the contact form to inform us of the infringing material. Include the link to the content on our site, and a link to something that indicates you hold copyright, and we’ll remove it immediately. Seriously, we’re not trying to step on anyone’s toes here. All our content is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 US Licensed. That means you can use it, but give us credit. Failure to do so will result in us sending The A Team after you, and I mean the George Peppard/Dirk Bennedict/Mr. T/Dwight Schultz version, not those 2010 wanna-bes. We pity the fool that rips us off.

Inclusion of examples does not imply recommendations or endorsements by client companies. Links from the Website to other sites does not imply recommendations or endorsements by 0xcoffee of them. We have to say that just in case we link to some site that also has content from Glenn Beck or Rush Limbaugh. You shall not use this Website for any illegal purposes and in particular agree that you shall not send, use, copy, post (or allow anything to be sent, used, copied, or posted) which is defamatory or obscene or which is abusive, indecent or in breach of the privacy of any person. You agree not to send any unsolicited promotional or advertising material, spam or similar materials or any volume messages that may interfere with the operation of this Website or with the enjoyment of this Website by other visitors. (I’m not saying that what you’re doing is wrong, it’s just not right for this site.)

We reserve the right at any time and without notice to enhance, modify, alter, suspend or permanently discontinue all or any part of this Website and to restrict or prohibit access to it. That includes retroactively editing pages to fix typos, errors, or omissions, changing permalink structures, moving all/any/none of the content to a new domain, or just abandoning it completely. It’ll happen. Besides, it’s our Website and we’ll cry if we want to. I mean, change it if we want to.

You hereby agree to indemnify us against any costs, claims, losses and damages (including legal fees) incurred by or awarded against us as a result of your use or misuse of this Website or your breach of these terms. Word. At our discretion, we may suspend or block your access to this Website and refuse to provide you with any further access to it. So don’t be mean, will ya? Mean people suck, and извините, но мне не нужно порно ссылки.

This Website is provided to you free of charge, and neither we nor any of our employers, clients, subsidiary or affiliated companies accept any liability to you whether in contract, tort (including negligence) or otherwise, arising out of or in connection with this Website. We accept no liability for any direct, special, indirect or consequential damages, or any other damages of whatsoever kind however arising through the use of the Website or any information obtained either directly or indirectly from this Website. Your sole remedy is to discontinue using this Website.

These terms may be amended by us from time to time at any time and without prior notice and the changes will become effective immediately after posting the revised terms. See? We’re tricky like that. You can review the most current version of the terms at any time right here. They’ll be here for you 24/7, unless of course we choose to invoke one of our rights above, like shutting down, moving, or, say, if Al comes back, takes his ball, and goes home. You are responsible for checking periodically for changes and your continued use of this Website indicates your acceptance of the new terms. If you like that sort of thing, have it. We appreciate the hit count boost. But we like the other sections of the Website a lot better than this one. (No offense, law-dogs.)

Comments remain the property and the responsibility of the actual poster. Believing in open communication, comments that are relevant may be approved for display without the implication of agreement with the comment.

Links to external sites are believed correct at the time posted, but content on those sites are beyond our control. Please leave a comment in the relevant post if you find a broken link.

Your use of this Website and downloads from it, and the operation of these terms, shall be governed in accordance with the laws of the State of South Carolina. The South Carolina courts shall have exclusive jurisdiction over any dispute arising out of your use of this Website. And really, do you want to mess with the state of South Carolina? We’re so far behind, we’re ahead. And that could mean bad news for you either-way. Thus ends the reading of the terms and conditions. If you have any questions, we’re sorry, we don’t have the answers. 42

FTC Disclosure

last updated 2011-11-09 In an effort to comply with recent FTC rulings regarding bloggers, please note the following.

I may choose to review something simply because I think it is that good. I might also review something for which I have received some form of compensation from the creator/publisher/author of the product being reviewed. This could include direct payment, NFR licenses, free product, or other consideration.  In either case, the post will be tagged as a review. I may also post guest blog posts from time to time. I consider these to be interesting and related to the overall theme of this blog. I may receive payment for posting these, I may receive a token of appreciation, or I may simply choose to post them because I like them. Being my blog, I can do that.

I would happily write a book review for any technology book, should you care to send me a free copy and it is within an area of my interest. If the book is good, I will even say so. If it is not, I won’t. Of course, if I don’t want to read the book I will send it back (postage due.) I would happily write a product review in exchange for a free product that I would like, again with the understanding that if the product is good, I will say so, if not, not, and if it is not something I would use, I’ll return it (postage due.) This disclosure will be updated should I ever receive swag, a book, gear, or if anything else substantial changes that relates to this blog.

Site Disclosure

As of 2011-07-05,  I work as an FTE for Microsoft. The opinions and views expressed in this blog are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily state or reflect those of Microsoft. While I have always been a pro Microsoft advocate, now that I work for them, please be aware of that relationship. In the event I make any recommendation for their products or solutions, or against any of their competitors, I am simply stating my personal opinion on my own blog, and in no way should this be interpreted as a statement from or on behalf of Microsoft Corporation.

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